Hannah Louisee | ♡

Depression? Anxiety? Feeling alone?

Soooo.... how to start this post is what I've been thinking about all day. I recently spoke to a friend about the fact I really want to get nitty and gritty as they say and write about real topics, emotions, debates and life it self, getting abit close and personal with the people who read my blog so far.

Whilst speaking to this friend she opened up to me about her hardship over the past few months. Before I say anything else I would just like to say that this person is very strong in every way imaginable, to cope over this hard time and I truly admire the person she is and I'm not just saying that because I know she reads my posts. The moral of this story is that most of us in hard times put our heads in the sand and often become isolated, and the most upsetting thing is we believe that we are alone. Now I will admit to be one of those people. I have been diagnosed with depression and have been on anti-depressants for a few months now. I don't dwell on that and I do not wear it on my sleeve in fact the only people that actually know that about me is my family and my boyfriend as cringe as that is to write and now you. I've always been told that I'm a happy person and I make people laugh, whether they are laughing at me or with me and I actually love that I am described in that way.

From my own experience I often wonder about other people, whether they wear a mask in front of people and friends and become something else behind closed doors. Luckily I have a family that never let me cope with my issues alone. Depression and anxiety should not define the person you are and it should not take over your life. I know what it's like to feel numb and just want to stay in bed and be in your own bubble all day every day but it doesn't get you anywhere instead you just feel worse. It's not like you can explain to someone who doesn't have depression what it's like to have it but to me it's just being numb 24/7 feeling like you have no one to talk to or turn to when really like me you probably have a house full of people to turn to, you just need to take that mask off and let someone into your bubble even if that time is 2minutes. I still have bad days and I really do have to bite my tongue when I'm faced with arrogant and ignorant people but I do it as my depression doesn't define me as a person. 

I just want to say to those going through hard times that you are not alone and you do not have to go through a hard time and think that there is only one way out; because there isn't! You just have to remember that when you get low the outcome will be a high as long as you believe in that 'light at the end of the tunnel'. Don't stop seeing your friends and making memories, and don't ever feel like you are not a worthy person. Its often those who can smile in the hardest times that are the strongest of people and I truly believe in that.

As short and maybe pointless this post is I hope that at least one person from this can look at the day more positively and get it stuck in their head that this is a battle that can be won. I also had to write this because its been on my mind for a fair time now and it would be a massive disappointment if I let my friends down and not post this! 

Much love
Hannah